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[mrballisticsdummy]

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[mrballisticsdummy]

Good, because I can't take care of you forever!

[statementfuckingends]

Don't worry - as soon as we hand you off to Kepler at the altar you're legally his problem again, not mine. Taking care of me returns to being fully optional!

[mrballisticsdummy]

Aww, are you going to walk me down the aisle?

[statementfuckingends]

What, you don't think it doesn't sound a bit poetic? After all the shit you've given me I finally get to hand you back off to the person who'll reward you for it.

[mrballisticsdummy]

Well, my dad sure as fuck isn't going to do it, so sure, Tim. You can be my daddy for my wedding.

[He. Cannot. Stop. Giggling.]

[statementfuckingends]

[No, you know what, fuck you Jacobi he's gonna win this one.]

That's sir to you, you little turd.

[mrballisticsdummy]

Oh now I get to call you sir? You threw such a tantrum when I did it at the beginning!

[statementfuckingends]

I like to think we've both grown as people since then. My hot young thing's all grown up and ready to bomb the world without daddy needing to reward him for behaving.

[This is now a game of Chicken.]

[mrballisticsdummy]

Nope, nope, nope, you win. I can't. I made a mistake.

[statementfuckingends]

Hah!

[It's all he can do to keep from bursting into laughter, but the grin in his voice is extremely wide.]

Don't know why I didn't try that years ago, honestly.

[mrballisticsdummy]

Shut up.

Come by for drinks and a movie tonight?

[statementfuckingends]

Of course. We finishing off the Harry Potter movies or have you found yourself on a better series?

[mrballisticsdummy]

No. We are going to finish what we started! Those little shits are gonna get that no-nosed bastard.

[statementfuckingends]

Hey, I'm only here to finish what you started. Fitting, really. You want me to bring anything for drinking to snot-nosed drama?

[mrballisticsdummy]

Oh ha ha.

Bring the beer. I'll have Warren make snacks.

[statementfuckingends]

And he'll be there about fifteen minutes later with a casually pilfered six-pack from the Lounge (and about ten of those spent chatting with Raylan) before he knocks on Warren and Jacobi's door briefly before he lets himself in.

"So, where were we up to again? There's too many parts after the fourth movie."

[mrballisticsdummy]

"We just started with the the horrible lady in pink," he says from the couch, where a whole host of movie snacks are laid out. Jacobi's already into the popcorn.

[statementfuckingends]

"Order of the Phoenix, then," he replies cheerfully, putting the beer on the table before he slams bodily into the cushion next to Jacobi.

[mrballisticsdummy]

Jacobi wraps an arm around his shoulders and then tries to drag him forward so he can snag a beer. "That's the one, yup."

[statementfuckingends]

And of course he'll let himself get dragged forward, using the motion to harvest a handful of dry snacks and a few pieces of hard cheese.

"You know, I have to wonder if there's any copies of the series left in paper form in the library now," he muses, not trying to hide the grin in his voice.

[mrballisticsdummy]

And then Jacobi's legs are in his lap as he leans back on the couch, taking his arm away to open his beer. "Why? Thinking of catching up on your YA reading?"

[statementfuckingends]

He tips his head in joking acknowledgement. "Oh yeah, I'm thinking about starting up a book club for the kids, you know?" He pops a cracker into his mouth and continues, mouth half full, "It's not like any of them will have read it before, might as well start with the classics."

[mrballisticsdummy]

"Oh sure. They can start with Harry Potter and the Mountain of Trauma. Or Harry Potter Goes to Therapy. That's the kind of books those kids need," he snorts.

[statementfuckingends]

"Harry Potter and the Literally Everything And Everyone Trying To Kill Me," he intones dramatically. "Highly relatable to the youths."

[mrballisticsdummy]

"Harry Potter and the Lack of Parental Oversight," he cackles. "Say what you want about my dad, but at least my mom still likes me! And I was a very well behaved youth."