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[mrballisticsdummy]

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[epistemological]

Funny you say that, as I've actually devoured a star once. Of a kind, at least.

And you're the one answering and you're 'pissed' with me so I'm either more amusing or I'm the only one in the queue.

[mrballisticsdummy]

I was pissed at you twelve hours ago.

Not many people beating down my door to talk to me.

Go to sleep, Jon. You'll keep the boyfriend awake.

[epistemological]

He's taking the dog for a walk. Or did you think we were to bed at nine o'clock?

[mrballisticsdummy]

I imagine more boring things for your life. So that fits in nicely to the story I've constructed about you.

[epistemological]

Do go on. I'm sure this will be ridiculous.

[mrballisticsdummy]

I have suddenly found myself with a lot more thinking time. So yes. It is ridiculous. Strap in.

You wake up early. Do something exceptionally British like drink tea while staring longing at a picture of the Queen. Then it's off to the library to sit around and help people find whatever stupid shit comes into their brains. And then you come home, watch a terrible documentary about fish or the types of sand in the Sahara, and then it's off to bed at around eight after a long day.

[epistemological]

Other than the Queen, who I'm not discussing if we're going to have a civil discussion of any sort that isn't me ranting for an hour and a half about the absolute bullshit waste of taxes that is the 'royal family', and the choice of documentaries and the bed time... it's not entirely off.

[mrballisticsdummy]

Oh shit, really?

Please get a life.

[epistemological]

I'm just fine with my lack of one, thank you. Boring is a luxury when you're mostly trying to avoid your fifth kidnapping a

GODDAMMIT

[mrballisticsdummy]

??

[epistemological]

Would you, or would you not, consider it being 'kidnapped' to have been beaten until unconsciousness (for whatever reason) and stashed in a cupboard to be interrogated later?

[mrballisticsdummy]

Yes?

You have completely lost me.

[epistemological]

So you would consider it a kidnapping?

[mrballisticsdummy]

Kidnapping is literally just taking someone and holding them captive.

So yes.

[epistemological]

Fuck.



Sorry, sorry, it's fine.

What were we talking about?

[mrballisticsdummy]

About how you're an absolute fucking nutjob.

What the fuck Jon?

[epistemological]

Look, it's not all that difficult.

I had a good streak running where I hadn't been kidnapped for ages and now it's broken. Give me a moment.

[mrballisticsdummy]

What is your life?

I've gone over my time anyway.

Thanks for the distraction.

[epistemological]

You know the answer.

I'll leave you alone now, though feel free to ping back if you hit a wall.