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Ah, I see. Understood.
It probably has something to do with... both of us being lawyers? The definition of lying. Verses the spirit of lying. They're handled differently. Especially in contracts.
See you soon.
It probably has something to do with... both of us being lawyers? The definition of lying. Verses the spirit of lying. They're handled differently. Especially in contracts.
See you soon.
Hello, Jacobi.
Can we set aside some time to discuss what happened?
Can we set aside some time to discuss what happened?
I'll reserve one of the private counseling rooms. You're welcome any time in the next hour. All I want to do is ask a few questions. That's all.
B and Rita present as advocates for both of our welfare, in case that is of any concern.
B and Rita present as advocates for both of our welfare, in case that is of any concern.
Bonus cons, Martin would definitely get mad. Though I don't think the pair of you have formally met yet. And I would definitely not be above making stab jokes about it in polite company.
Appreciate that it's only "sometimes" I'm an absolute wanker.
Appreciate that it's only "sometimes" I'm an absolute wanker.
Haven't met him. Probably should. One day.
And you would probably annoy another person more than me. We're too alike for me to be genuinely annoyed with you. It's like being annoyed with a less cool version of myself!
And you would probably annoy another person more than me. We're too alike for me to be genuinely annoyed with you. It's like being annoyed with a less cool version of myself!
Clearly that means we ought to find someone to gang up on and drive them insane instead.
Also: excuse you, l e s s cool?
Also: excuse you, l e s s cool?
That sounds like a challenge.
And yes.
Are you denying it?
I'm ex military. I've been to space. I blow things up.
You sort things.
And yes.
Are you denying it?
I'm ex military. I've been to space. I blow things up.
You sort things.
Flirt my way into confidential documents, work multiple angles on often dubiously ethical and highly illegal investigation fronts, research and interrogate subjects for follow-up statements. I'm practically a secret agent.
You're EX-military, doesn't sound that impressive. You worked in a falling-apart station in the highly metaphorical sticks and bLoW ThInGs Up.
You're EX-military, doesn't sound that impressive. You worked in a falling-apart station in the highly metaphorical sticks and bLoW ThInGs Up.
You're practically a secret agent?
I AM a secret agent. Black ops baby.
And my station was amazing. The Urania was a beauty. The Hephaestus was trash.
Also it's cute how you think you're James Bond.
I AM a secret agent. Black ops baby.
And my station was amazing. The Urania was a beauty. The Hephaestus was trash.
Also it's cute how you think you're James Bond.
"Yeah," he says softly, tapping the page. "Yeah, fine. I can take that, I think."
He shrugs. "Not like I could stop you anyway."
He shrugs. "Not like I could stop you anyway."
"I don't mind," comes the honest answer. "Really, I don't."
That gets a laugh.
"Yeah. That will do a lot for my image around here. But I'll keep that in mind."
"Yeah. That will do a lot for my image around here. But I'll keep that in mind."
[After Jacobi sings this post to her.]
Thank you.
[A pause, and then:] Warren let me listen to his file, just before the breach.
Thank you.
[A pause, and then:] Warren let me listen to his file, just before the breach.
You're welcome. Backstreet Boys isn't my forte, but hey. I've got no shortage of material!
And...the file, huh? You know, he hasn't even shared that with me. So congrats to you. I mean, I know a lot of it already, so it doesn't really matter.
Anyway.
Questions, comments, concerns?
And...the file, huh? You know, he hasn't even shared that with me. So congrats to you. I mean, I know a lot of it already, so it doesn't really matter.
Anyway.
Questions, comments, concerns?
He read mine. It was a trade.
Some of it was you. Not just about you, but in your voice, things you've said to him or about him. When I asked about one piece of it, he was infuriating, but I suppose I still appreciated the perspective.
Oh, the tapes, yeah. And he's really good at pissing people off. He sucks so hard sometimes.
Did the file go through our first mission?
Did the file go through our first mission?
[To be fair, it isn't hard to make Ulla angry. She has a lot of sore points, these days, and Kepler hits too close to home.]
No, there weren't any details about that.
First job I ever had with him, we ended up in this basement when things just go wrong. Like, really wrong. Super wrong. This prototype, explosive demolition device gets armed, and it's about to blow our faces off. And that? Is my job. To make sure that it doesn't. So Kepler turns to me and he says,'Mr. Jacobi, please take that thing apart, quick as you like." And I - I freeze. I'd never seen anything like that thing. I had no idea how to begin disarming it. So I tell him that we should do the manly thing and, well, run for our lives. But I'm sure you know by now that he didn't let that fly. You know what Kepler does? He goes to the door and he locks us in. And he turns to me, and says, 'Go take that bomb apart.'
[He pauses.]
So I did. And we were fine.
But I was fucking pissed at him for weeks. He could have killed us.
[He pauses.]
So I did. And we were fine.
But I was fucking pissed at him for weeks. He could have killed us.
[She laughs. Really, it fits right in with the part of Kepler's file that she brought up after listening. Which she'll admit to Jacobi.]
I asked him about when you said, 'He knows potential when he sees it. And he knows how to push.' I wanted to know if that was how he planned on looking at me.
Ugh, probably. I used to tell people that because, well, it's true, but also to make them think that he's not as big of a dick as he really is.
He's going to tell you that he's going to help you, that he wants you to be the best version of yourself, or some bullshit like that. But what's really going to happen is that you're going to end up fighting against him because he's gotta be full of shit, right?
And then you end up being the best fucking whatever the hell you want to be because of him. And then you have to look at his stupid smug face because, once again, he was right.
He's going to tell you that he's going to help you, that he wants you to be the best version of yourself, or some bullshit like that. But what's really going to happen is that you're going to end up fighting against him because he's gotta be full of shit, right?
And then you end up being the best fucking whatever the hell you want to be because of him. And then you have to look at his stupid smug face because, once again, he was right.
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